About Sugar Mama…

Hiya. I’m living proof that you can’t have it all. The Big Lie of the 1980’s (when I came of age) was that women could have the perfect career and the perfect home life. As a child of the times, I assumed that it would be no trouble to have a career and a family, keep a perfect, immaculate home, maintain all my relationships, look great all the time, and escape the zombie apocalypse with a kid under each arm and my diploma in my mouth.

By the time I was nursing my 3rd child in one arm while writing a master’s thesis with the other, as well as working part-time, it was clear this was not going to happen. Not only couldn’t I have it all, I really wasn’t equipped with the tools required for my fantasy life. I’m terribly disorganized in my personal life (although I somehow manage to maintain a pretty good facade at work).  I am able to maintain a healthy weight, or keep a clean house, but certainly not at the same time. It just requires more mental and physical energy than I currently possess. Now that I’m quickly approaching my 40th birthday, I realize that at some point I gave up both. My life has spun out of control, and I need to regain just a little before the zombies come if I’m going to survive.

So here’s the summary: I am married to a fellow slob, making life that much more difficult. We have three kids, two teenagers and a grade schooler. I currently work full time, teaching special education. I sometimes have moments of insanity where I imagine going back to school again for a PhD, but all I have to do is look at my sink full of dirty dishes, the huge pile of laundry that my family affectionately calls “Mount Crap,” and the empty bag of Lay’s on the floor next to my bed, to know that that would tip me over the edge. Just call me zombie fodder. Everyone knows they go for the juicy ones first, and man am I juicy!!!

  1. Thanks for the too-too lovely portrait, Turtlespoon. I may need to use that someday if I ever get chosen to be in one of those “before/after” makeover layouts in a magazine.

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